


That One Supernatural High School AU Nobody Asked For But Everybody Loves

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Bullying, Child Abuse, Demisexual Castiel, Demisexuality, Depression, F/F, Feels, Fluff, From The Author And The Characters, Gabriel the trickster, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Humor, I Poured My Heart And Soul Into This, I'm Writing This On A Whim, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Lucifer is a Good Bro, M/M, Not literally, Pining, Pranks, Self-Doubt, So If I Forget This Please Don't Kill Me, That Would Be Wierd, death by feels, demi!cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2016-06-20
Packaged: 2018-05-22 12:23:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 10,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6079173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Sam have a shit childhood. That's it. Their childhood filled with expectations and limits and, more importantly, an abusive father. At school though, nobody knows. The bruises- from Dean's football practice, of course. And Sam's secret anxiety attacks- nobody knows about them. Not even Dean.</p><p>Now, the Novak household is happy. Will they save Sam and Dean? Yes, yes they will. The more important question is, will Dean and Sam let them?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wake Me Up When It's All Over

"Dean. Get up. Made breakfast." Sam hissed to his older brother. Dean sat up and rubbed his eyes, "Wha' time's it?"

"Four thirty. If we're lucky we can get out before Dad gets up." Sam said. He was completely dressed and Dean was still in his pajamas. He grabbed an AC/DC tee and some jeans, his leather jacket and the Samulet, throwing it all on over his Batman boxers.

"'Kay, bitch, let's go." Dean whispered to his brother, grabbing some bacon and toast for the road. The two settled into the roar of the Impala's engine and drove off towards the school.

.o0o.

"UP UP UP UP UP!" Lucifer nearly screamed, dancing around the room. Cas and Gabe groaned into their pillows. Anna- ever the ray of sunshine- threw her pillow in Lucifer's general direction. Diri and Hael just slept through it, they'd sleep through anything.

"Why?" Cas asked in what he assumed was God's general direction, before reluctantly hopping up and getting dressed in a button-up shirt and slacks, not forgetting his trench coat.

"Because." Luci grinned, "If it makes you feel better, Dad's making breakfast."

"He makes breakfast every day." Cas pointed out. Diri and Hael took _that_ opportunity to bolt awake and scramble into t-shirts and jeans.

"WOULD YOU KIDS STOP BICKERING AND COME EAT?" Chuck called from the bottom floor. The kids eventually made their way down the stairs- Anna being the last one.

"Waffles. Eat up." Chuck placed a delicious-smelling treat in front of each of his kids.

"Thanks, Dad." Cas was the only one to properly thank his adoptive father before wolfing down the waffle. Trickster- Gabriel's dog- seemed to have the most impeccable timing and trotted into the room, looking around for food. The Jack Russell settled for laying his head on Gabriel's lap and giving him the most desperate puppy dog eyes Gabriel had ever seen.

"Fine, Trick, you little shit." Gabriel rolled his eyes and gave Trickster some of his waffle. Trickster swallowed it whole and resumed the behavior.

"Can somebody tell him I can't give him any more?" Gabriel sighed, placing his dish in the sink.

"No can do, but I will drive you to school for your first day." Chuck said, "Now get in the hippie van."

"Can't I drive my own car?" Cas asked.

"No. You don't want to drive _that_ thing to school on the first day." Lucifer rolled his eyes.

"Oh, like your van's any better!" Cas rebutted.

"Now, now, I'm driving. Get in the car, you whores." Chuck chided. All of the children clambered into the van- Hael and Diri destined for Kindergarten, Gabe for middle school, Cas, Anna, and Lucifer being delivered to the high-school.

"Off we go!" Chuck said, pulling out. They found three adjoined schools and Diri and Hael were dropped off first.

"G'dbye munchkins." Luci pulled the two into a Satan-sized hug, and pecking Hael on the top of her head.

"Bye, Satan!" Diri said the response Luci had kept them up forever trying to teach them. Chuck smacked Luci lightly on the top of the head for that on when he got back from dropping the little kids off.

"Hey," Luci looked slightly offended, but climbed back into the passenger's seat (he definitely wasn't crying, and he definitely wasn't going to miss the little shits).

"Why don't you just walk?" Chuck sighed, "Gas ain't cheap, y'know."

"We're lazy." the remaining kids chorused back to him. Thankfully, the middle and high-school drop-off zones were shared, so Chuck only had to stop one more time.

"Remember, don't impregnate any women," Chuck gave his annual start-of-year speech, "And if you are bullied tell Luci, he's the only one I know who's not afraid to physically pry their souls from their bodies." Lucifer nodded proudly.

"Bye, Dad." the children said happily, Anna kissing their father on the cheek before the four of them went in to get their schedules and locker combinations.

"Hey, Lose-chester!" a voice called out for another boy. The other boy was up against the wall and sporting a bloody nose. Gabriel felt the blood rushing in his veins.

"Luci. Find Luci." Gabriel muttered to himself, turning around to do just that, but another man- Cassie would like him, Gabriel decided- appeared, almost more terrifying than Luci. Almost.

"You get away from my baby brother!" he snarled in the bully's face. The bully turned to face the shorter of the two- the younger one, by the looks of him- and said, "One day, little nerd, your precious _Dean_ won't be around, and on that day, you're gonna taste dirt."

"Get away." Dean- the taller one- said, quite calmly. His eyes, on the other hand, were shining with a familiar fire. It certainly sent the other man running.

"You okay, Sammy?" Dean asked as Gabriel stalked away, plotting the bully's downfall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to clear up any confusion, for now Sam's the older one.
> 
> Update: Holy shit did I really make that mistake?! Lol, I mean shorter. I apologize for my late-nite typos.


	2. Crowley Is A Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look at the title of the chapter. If you still need any indication of what's going to happen in this chapter, Crowley gets in touch with his inner asshole. My favorite Supernatural thing has to be good bro Luci, so I put him in there as a good bro.

"Sammy." a voice hissed in Sam's ear.

"What do you want, Crowley?" Sam growled back, ready to defend himself, and knowing that it would never work. In response to Sam's question Crowley slammed him up against the locker for the second time that day. Sam sighed. _What is it with lockers and these people?_ he thought to himself.

"I want some lunch money." Crowley said quite plainly.

"Can you _be_ any more stereotypical?" Sam huffed, panic beginning to set in.

" _Now_ , Moosey, or I might just give your face a good pounding." Crowley's voice was dripping with false sweetness.

"F-fine." Sam knew he was opening himself up to more bullying, but he was putting most of his effort into the 'don't have a complete mental and emotional breakdown in school' section of his brain. He reached into his pocket to remember something awful. _Dean had had a broken leg._ He hadn't been able to work for a week. _There was no money._ Sam's breathing quickened and his eyes dilated.

"What's the matter?" Crowley asked curiously.

"I won't p-pay you." Sam stuttered.

"Least you can do, I mean, you didn't help me with my homework." Crowley's smile grew into a shark-toothed grin.

"I won't pay you." Sam tripped over every word and it came out way too quietly.

"Then I'll just," Crowley pounded his fist into Sam's stomach. Sam felt his chest tighten. Crowley let Sam go with a final, "If I see you again today, you'd better have the money. Or I might just tell your father about your little... problem. See what happens when Dean isn't around?"

"Yeah, but you know who is?" a voice came from behind Crowley. He loosened his hold on Sam just long enough for Sam to get away and into a men's room. Sam's chest heaved as Sam tried to catch his breath, but it just... wasn't working. Every breath burned and felt way too deep, like he couldn't get air in. His skin felt like it was crawling with bugs, and his heart was going nuts. There was a feeling of deep-rooted panic spreading from his toes to his hair.

"Hey." a strange boy sat down beside him.

"You okay?" he asked Sam. Sam quickly nodded his head _yes_. Nobody should have to be burdened with his problems. Who would care anyway?

"You are most definitely _not_ okay." the boy's eyebrows furrowed.

"Hey- hey-" the boy noticed Sam's breathing pick up again, "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. Name's Luci. Well, actually, it's Lucifer, but everyone calls me Luci." Sam chuckled at the name a little bit, the humor was a welcome distraction.

"Who names their kid Lucifer?" Sam croaked.

"Apparently, my adoptive father. I'm adopted." he smiled easily in Sam's direction. It struck Sam quickly that there was a stranger _sitting on the floor of a filthy men's bathroom_ with him.

"What is it?" Luci seemed to be very intuitive.

"Why did you stop for me?" Sam asked.

"Because you seemed sad, and I don't like it when people are sad." Luci shrugged.

"Oh." Sam said quietly.

"I dealt with Crowley, he shouldn't bother you any time soon." Lucifer said soothingly to Sam.

"Thank you." Sam wrapped his arms around Luci's body.

"Would you like to come over to our house tonight?" Luci asked politely.

"No- no." Sam said quickly.

"Is there a time in which you would like to come to our house?" Luci asked.

"No." Sam responded.

"That's a shame." Luci continued to smile brightly, "Would you mind telling me why?"

"No." Sam's response made Luci kind of suspicious.

"Okay, let me rephrase. If your schedule was open and there were no other deciding factors, would you like to come over to our house?" Luci pried.

"No- yes." Sam admitted, "But you can't tell anybody."

"Why?"

"I can't tell you. Now if you'll excuse me, I have history this hour and I can't be too late." Sam abruptly got up off the floor- panic attack averted- and left the room, leaving Luci to puzzle over what the sixth grader had said to the senior.


	3. Potato

"Sammy, we have to go." Dean said, dragging Sam out of the library.

"But I was almost done!" Sam protested.

"Sammy, you know how Dad'll get. We have to get home. Now." Dean said. Sam reluctantly left said library, feeling regret. The book he'd been reading _had_ been awesome, but for whatever reason, John took a particular approach to reading that was similar to Matilda's parents.

"You can read it tomorrow." Dean sighed. He really hated to do this to his brother, but unfortunately John wouldn't stand for them being anything less than perfect.

"Thank you." Sam's eyes shone with such happiness at the little thought, and it made Dean's day. This was often why fights between the Winchester brothers didn't last long, and why the other students often goggled at their close bond.

"Hey, Sam." Lucifer greeted Sam as the two exited. Dean, a junior, was extremely suspicious of the man, but Sam smiled easily at him.

"Bye, Luci." Sam's smile turned sad, and Lucifer's face took on a determined look.

"Who was he?" Dean asked.

"Lucifer." Sam shrugged, "He's a friend."

"I thought Jessica was your friend?" Dean pressed.

"She's got a boyfriend now. Hardly pays any attention to me- not that I mind." Sam added quickly when he saw Dean's face contort into one of rage. They got into the Impala and Dean started her up.

"Well then, how's your homework comin' along?" Dean asked as he backed up.

"Finished it." Sam replied, "Got 100% on my math test."

"Good job, Sammy." Dean ruffled Sam's hair as the two drove off towards their house.

.o0o.

"I'm tellin' you, something's not _right_!" Lucifer protested.

"Luci, I heard you the first time." Chuck sighed, "And we cannot just call Child Protection Services because of a sixth grader dodging your questions."

" _Fine_." Luci threw his hands up in defeat and retreated to the living room, where Gabe and Balthazar- Gabe's friend- were playing Mario Kart. Not wanting to have his childhood innocence ruined, again, Luci instead took to his room upstairs to check his email and watch _Dan and Phil Play Minecraft!_ , which was just as entertaining as it sounded. 

.o0o.

"I have a crush." Cas admitted dreamily to Anna. Anna's head snapped up from the bottom bunk of their shared bed.

"Who." Anna repeated the word so swiftly she sounded like an owl.

"He's a football player." Cas sighed, "His eyes are dreamy and he has a little brother and his name's Dean-"

"You have a crush on _Dean Winchester_?!" Anna shrieked, hopping up and joining Cas on his bunk.

"Called it, fifty bucks, Luci!" Gabriel said triumphantly.

"Called _what_ , squirt?" Anna asked, narrowing her eyes.

"Cas is a major disturbance to my gaydar." Gabriel said slightly snootily.

"Gabriel." Cas said seriously, "A gaydar is absolute nonsense."

"I've never been wrong." Gabriel insisted.

"Shut up." Cas growled, flopping back down onto the bed. As it turned out, this would start a major confession chain.

"I'm gay." Luci nearly whispered from his single bed, which was occupied by him, a mug of something (honestly at this point even Luci didn't know- but it was keeping him awake), his laptop, and _Binge_ , because who can resist Tyler Oakley?

"No shit Sherlock." Gabriel rolled his eyes, "And I'm pansexual."

"I have no friggin' clue what I am," Anna said, seriously confused, "So if any of you have any ideas, feel free to tell me."

"WOULD YOU KIDS GO TO BED? YOU HAVE SCHOOL TOMORROW!" Chuck yelled from his study.

"Shit." Lucifer cursed. Anna hopped down to her bunk and Gabe fell asleep, snoring so loudly it kept Cas awake. Well, that and Luci's computer screen, which wouldn't stop glowing for at least another hour. And Dean.

"Luci, did I tell you about how _greeeeeeeen_ his eyes are?" Cas sighed dreamily, giving up on sleeping. Lucifer sighed much less dreamily, and more in the sense to restrain himself from snapping his little brother's neck.

"Castiel James Novak, go to sleep or I will smite your precious human out of spite." Lucifer said drearily, actually falling asleep before midnight for once.

"Fine." Cas huffed, hugging his pillow and dreaming a happy dream filled mostly with Dean.

.o0o.

"Gotta hurry in Sammy." Dean whispered. Sam nodded and the two crept into the house, praying that John was asleep and they were going to be lucky tonight.

"BOYS!" a roar from the kitchen made Dean and Sam flinch. A bottle smashed behind Dean's back, and he and Sam raced up the creaky stairs to their bedroom. Or rather, Dean's, but they shared. It was better than John being able to get into Sam's room, which ever since the fire hadn't been able to lock properly.

"G'night, Sammy." Dean ruffled Sam's hair proudly one more time. Sam shot his brother a look of annoyance that didn't hide his affection very well. Both brothers got undressed and Sam went to his bed while Dean got the lights.

"Goodnight, jerk." Sam got comfortable under the covers.

"Bitch." Dean flipped off the lights and jumped back into his bed, military-style. It was a fun game. One of the few that the boys got to play any more. Their mother had died in a fire almost twelve years prior, and their father hadn't ever gotten over her death. Dean was sixteen and Sam twelve (and a half).

"I'm bi, Dean." Sam said suddenly, just as he was about to drift off.

"That's nice. So am I." Dean admitted, letting sleep wash over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also if you could just ignore the comment that _for some reason keeps showing up_ until I figure out how to fix it, I would greatly appreciate it.


	4. Why Am I So Bad At Titles- A Song, By Me

"'Kay, Sammy, up 'n at 'em!" Dean said cheerily, "Found a note on the fridge- says 'Back in two weeks.'!"

"Really?" Sam looked as though Christmas had come early.

"Yeah, come on, I'll make breakfast. And this time it _won't_ be toast and bacon!" Dean skipped- yeah you read that right- down to the kitchen.

"Really, Dean?" Sam prodded his meal, "Cheeseburgers? For breakfast?"

"Oh, just eat it." Dean snapped, "I'm nesting."

"Okay, then." Sam took a bite of cheeseburger, "Oh myf gof, tis is delishus." Dean laughed at Sam's mispronunciations as he attempted to talk around his burger.

"Oh shit- we've got school in like ten minutes." Dean cursed, gathering his things, "Sam, get in Baby." Sam obliged without hesitation (hey, even if he was bullied- he'd be even more so if he showed up late, right?)

"How's school goin'?" Dean made easy conversation as they drove to school.

"You asked me that last night." Sam shot Dean bitchface #1.3 (the I-know-what-you're-doing-and-it's-not-working face).

"I know. What's _really_ going on at school?" Dean turned to face Sam, face grim, "'Cause I know that Lucifer kid. He's bad news."

"He's my friend." Sam insisted, "We met. We're friends now. That's all you need to know."

"Well, that doesn't sound like you're running the mafia with him at all." Dean said sarcastically, pulling in to the school.

"When you get back, you _will_ tell me what's really going on. I'm worried about you, Sammy." Dean flashed his puppy eyes, rarely used, but still 100% effective.

"Fine." Sam sighed, "Crowley's been bullying me."

"That little shit." Dean snarled, "I told him that if he did it again I'd rip out his lungs and beat him with them!"

"See, this is why!" Sam protested, "Please don't tell him I told you."

"Why?" Dean pried against his better judgment- not to mention the bell, which seemed to have the worst timing.

"Can't tell you- got to go- bye!" Sam escaped having to mention his panic attack to Dean and bounded off towards his first hour.

.o0o.

"GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!" Luci's wake-up call reverberated throughout the room. Cas had the misfortune of banging his head on the ceiling and gripped his bruised forehead during breakfast.

"Good eggs, Gabe." Anna commented, "I thought they would be literally made of candy." a snigger went through the room and Gabe looked mockingly hurt.

"Anna, don't be silly, he ate all the sugar before he could put it in the eggs." Cas chided. Gabriel took the opportunity to poke Cas right in his bruise.

"Can we go now?" Diri was bored. Of course, with the whiney five-year-old whose sister happened to be the most adorable thing in creation, they couldn't ignore him.

"Yeah, yeah. Luci, you get to drive the children!" Chuck said, walking into his study to continue his book series. It made a decent income, and all the kids could have a few luxury items, like Luci's laptop, and Gabe's dog. Speaking of Gabe's dog, Trickster came bounding into the room to either look for food or attention. Probably both.

"Hey, Trick!" Gabriel cooed in the direction of his dog, which jumped into Gabriel's arms and started licking his face. So attention it was.

"Sorry, buddy, we have to go to school, okay?" Gabriel set his dog on the ground and resisted picking him up again when Trickster flashed his goddam puppy eyes. Gabe could never turn down puppy eyes, they were his Achilles Heel.

"Let's go, before the little bastard forces me to carry him to school." Gabriel said hurriedly, grabbing his backpack and marching out the door. Cas had gotten his own car- technically he had to share with Anna, but she didn't have a driver's license- and Lucifer had a van, which he had decorated with small 'practice' paintings and drove the kids to school in.

"Okay, bye munchkins." Lucifer smiled at Diri and Hael as Diri walked into the school like a friggin' king and Hael bouncing like the little ball of pure energy she was.

"Before you go-" Lucifer was going to bring up Sam to Gabriel.

"If you are about to kiss me, I swear to Satan-" Gabriel interrupted, but the interrupter was interrupted by Lucifer.

"Although I appreciate the sentiment, I was going to bring up a _story_ " Lucifer's eyes narrowed in a look of 'You Listen Here You Little Shit', "Yesterday, I stopped a kid from getting his face pounded in-"

"Good for you-"

"Don't interrupt." Lucifer chided, "Anyway, I'm not getting the impression that the kid has many friends, and we're new. You go make friends with the little nerd, his name's Sam Winchester."

" _Fine_." Gabriel's voice took on that of a middle schooler forced to mingle at a social event in which they just want to sit in the corner and read fanfiction.

"Go on, you're running late." Lucifer grinned, and, my God was it terrifying when he grinned like that. Gabriel dashed to the school, because sometimes his brothers scared him.

"Hello." a voice startled Lucifer as he locked his van. Lucifer must have jumped, because there was a sudden presence right at his side.

"I'm Michael." a tall, dark-haired man stood, holding his hand out for Lucifer to shake. Lucifer's brain, however, had decided to go on temporary hiatus, in favor of staring open-mouthed at said man and drooling.

"Sorry?" Lucifer must have had _that_ look on his face. Yes, he had resting bitchface syndrome.

"No- no." Lucifer apologized after he had gotten his bearings, breaking into a blinding smile, "Please continue." 

"I'm Michael." the brunet repeated, gesturing towards his hand. Luci shook it and responded, "Lucifer," and the two walked into the school.

"What the shit?" Michael's confused face was hilarious, and Lucifer couldn't help but break down into laughter at that.

"I know, ask my father about it." Lucifer grinned cheekily.

"Haha- nerd!" a familiar voice rang through the halls.

"Leave me alone!" an equally familiar voice said back.

"Cassie." Lucifer snarled, wheeling around to see his brother on the ground, desperately attempting to get his supplies- which had been scattered all over- and on the ground.

"Let's see, what's the little nerd drawn lately?" Crowley sniggered, picking up Cas' sketchbook. This particular sketchbook was one Cas wasn't inclined to share. It was the notebook he poured his soul into when it would burst out of his body somehow anyway.

"Don't!" Cas pleaded. Lucifer snarled again, and it must have been pretty terrifying, because some of the students- including Michael, sadly- squeaked and ran away. Lucifer paced up to the bully and the recipient, but then a less familiar voice spoke up.

"Leave him alone!"


	5. Potato Chapter 2 Because I'm Bad At Naming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory I love my readers note
> 
> I love you guys for commenting! Thank you so much for staying with me!

"Nerd." a voice spoke to Castiel. A hand smacked his books out of his hands. Cas' heart dropped when he realized that his sketchbook was among said books.

"Haha, nerd!" the same voice laughed at Cas as he scrambled to pick his stuff up.

"Hm, let's see, what's Cassie's drawn today?" said voice- _dear God_ \- was picking up his notebook and flipping to the first page.

"Stop!" Cas felt his voice rise from his throat. That was the notebook Cas drew his feelings in, let his thoughts run ramped and his hands just followed. 

"I'm curious." a strong looking man with black hair and devilish eyes thumbed to the first page of Cas' notebook.

"He said, stop." another voice chimed in. The bully turned around and Cas tried to catch a glimpse of his savior, but the bully was blocking his view.

"So, your little brother, this psycho, you a superhero now?"

"Damn right, I'm Batman." the second voice said, followed by the sound of skin hitting skin. The bully slinked off like the snake he was.

"You okay?" the second voice asked, crouching down to help Cas with his stuff.

"Not really." Cas wiped away a tear he didn't know was there.

"Well, he should leave you alone." the man's smile was life-ending. Seriously, it could have possibly killed Cas.

"I'm Dean, by the way." Dean extended his hand, and it took Cas a while to get what he was supposed to do with it. Eventually, Cas grabbed his hand, and hoped it looked like he was considering all his options.

"I thought Batman wasn't supposed to give away his secret identity?" Cas was genuinely confused.

"My God you are adorable." Dean mumbled, then blushed, "Holy crap, I said that out loud."

"Well, to be fair, you're pretty cute as well." Cas responded, blushing like crazy.

"Seriously?" Dean was... blushing too. Huh, I guess the author's feeling really inventive today.

"Yeah." Cas said, "So, isn't this the part where the jock asks the nerd out on a date?"

"Sorry- I can't..." Dean mumbled.

"What?" Cas asked, "Don't blasphemy me, Dean."

"Sorry." Dean mumbled again, walking away quickly towards an abandoned science lab. Cas- who probably should have minded his own business- followed suit.

"You ran off." Cas said when he found Dean, "Usually people don't do that."

"Sorry." Dean mumbled.

"You keep apologizing." Cas was concerned, "I can understand not wanting to date me, but you shouldn't apologize if you find me unattractive."

"You're not _unattractive_!" Dean stammered, "I just... can't."

"Why can't you?" Cas pried.

"Because." Dean's eyes were bright with tears.

"I am truly sorry, Dean." Cas said, "Would you like to be friends?" Dean thought for a moment. Sammy was number one priority, and would always be, and that never left Dean much time for friends. Or any time, really.

"I can't." Dean whispered, "I'm sorry."

"You have got nothing to be sorry for." Cas wrapped his arms around Dean's torso, and Dean melted into the hug because _gaddammit, it was impossible to stay upset with Cas in the room_.

"My father won't let me." Dean admitted finally, mostly because there was nobody watching. Although, he didn't know how Cas would take it.

"Y'know, I'm adopted." Cas said, "If your father is abusing you, Chuck would adopt you. He's already working on some other kids. He really likes kids." he let out a small chuckle at that.

"Really?" Dean buried his face into the crook of Cas' neck.

"Yes, Dean. I'm being completely serious." Cas affirmed.

"When can I go?" Dean felt something in the pit of his stomach. Something he hadn't felt- hadn't allowed himself to feel- in a long time.

Hope.

.o0o.

Gabriel trudged through the halls. _Make friends, Luci said, have fun, Luci said,_ Gabriel thought sadistically as he slammed his locker shut, _I don't even know who this kid is!_

"Hey, Gabe!" Luci called. Gabriel's head snapped up and he hurried to find his older brother.

"Where is he?" Gabe asked.

"Right here!" Luci pulled a boy who- surprisingly- was about Gabe's size. And pretty damn adorable, Gabe might add. It barely registered in Gabriel's mind that this kid was the one he'd seen bullied a few days ago.

"Hello." Gabe said, holding out his hand for the shy boy to take, "I'm Gabriel."

"Hi." Sam's voice was meek, "I'm Sam."

"You wanna get lunch?" Gabriel was already hungry. Luci snorted at that and left the two to their own devices. Meaning he vanished. Just like that. It was one of the things that made Luci so scary.

"Sure." Sam responded, dragging his feet as he moved along the halls.

"What's got you down, Mr. Grumpy Gills?" Gabriel teased.

"Nothing." Sam muttered, "You don't want to be near me for the next minute and a half."

"Might I ask why?" Gabriel pried.

"No, you may not." Sam said, picking up his pace.

"Well, hate to tell you, kiddo, I'm not going anywhere." Gabriel walked in sync with Sam.

"I'm the same age as you." Sam bitchfaced Gabriel.

"Still not leaving." Gabriel smiled.

"Please." Sam's puppy eyes melted Gabe's heart. Seriously, he was a blob on the ground. Someone needed to scrape his remains off the ground.

"No can do." Gabriel sighed. Sam's puppy dog eyes worsened and Gabriel had to physically restrain himself from burying the Precious in a hug, "You are adorable."

"Wait, what?" Sam looked surprised.

"Has nobody told you? You are adorable as a puppy." Gabriel smiled flirtily.

"Am not." Sam grumbled, kicking a rock that had made its way into the cafeteria.

"Hey, Lose-Chester!" a familiar insult worked its was through the cafeteria.

"Okay, first rule," Gabriel held up one finger, "This is _my_ nerd. You will not touch him." he glared pointedly at what he assumed was the bully's general direction, "Two," Gabriel held up a second finger, "If I catch you teasing, shoving, punching, kicking, or in any way intimidating, threatening, or abusing him, I will end you."

"You?" a voice chortled, "I'd like to see you take on a _puppy_ and win, shortstack."

"You'll regret that." Gabriel said smoothly, eyes burning with fire, "I'd watch your back." the bully just laughed some more, but left.

"See? All there is to it." Gabriel grinned at Sam, only to discover he'd run away. Gabriel searched all over for him, eventually finding him in one of the stalls of the bathroom.

"What's wrong?" Gabriel asked, concerned, when he found Sam hyperventilating.

"Nothing. Go away." Sam wheezed in reply. Gabriel figured now was as good a time as any to wrap Sam up in a bone-crushing hug, and thankfully, it seemed to do the trick.

"Now, tell me what's wrong." Gabriel said into their hug, "'Cause it sure as hell ain't nothing."

"Fine. Crowley's been bullying me and threatening me." Sam admitted, "He said that if I told anybody, he'd tell my dad that I'm bisexual."

"Oh." Gabriel was a little stunned, he'd thought Sam didn't want to be his friend after the whole 'cute' thing.

"And my dad hates anybody who's not straight. He'd hit me." Sam sniffled, "Well, he does that anyway. He might- do something else. And I understand if you don't want to be my friend-"

"Hey- I would never let anybody hurt you." Gabriel picked Sam's chin up so the Sam would look him in the eye, "Never again, you hear me? I will never let anybody hurt you ever again. And I would love to be your friend."

"Really?" it was a dream come true for Sam.

"Absolutely." Gabriel cooed, kissing Sam's forehead.

"Now, can you handle class, or do I need to take you back to my house?" Gabriel asked.

"I can handle class." Sam said.

"Awesome. I'm here if you need me, just remember that." Gabriel smiled as Sam led the way out of the restroom and back into the busy hallway.

"Okay." Sam said, walking away towards his locker, a wide grin on his face that he just couldn't get rid of.


	6. 'Cause I'm Gonna Make This Place Your Home

"Hey-a Cas." Dean smiled as the two walked out to Dean's car.

"Yes, Dean?" Cas rolled his eyes.

"Y'know, you are the most adorable human being in this whole- hmmf?" Cas had placed his lips over Dean's.

"Sorry, I'm not usually the adventurous one." Cas apologized, "And I am sorry if you did not want me to kiss you-"

"Didn't tell you to stop." Dean whined, kissing Cas back.

.o0o.

"Hey Sammich." Gabriel smiled at his friend as they left the building, "Wanna come over to my house?"

"I'd have to ask- oh." Sam's face broke into a devilish grin as he spied Dean kissing... Cas? Sam walked up to them and cleared his throat loudly, causing both parties involved to jump.

"What was that for, Sammy?" Dean complained.

"Can I go over to Gabe's?" Sam asked, "Please?" his puppy dog eyes again, goddammit.

"Fine, bitch." Dean smirked in Sam's direction, "Dad's gone for the week, remember?"

"Right, right. Jerk." Sam's smile was officially the cutest thing Gabriel had ever seen in all his years.

"C'mon, Sammy!" Gabriel called. Sam raced after his friend, and Dean and Cas resumed kissing. Dean reached one hand forward to rub the pad of his thumb over one of Cas' pecs, but it only proved to make Cas uncomfortable.

"Sorry, do you like it when I do that?" Dean apologized.

"I think this is a conversation better held in private." Cas muttered, "I'll just drop my keys off to Anna and we can talk in your car, as it appears that Sam and Gabriel are riding with Luci."

"Okay, although I have some qualms with leaving my brother in the hands of a mob boss." Cas cackled at Dean's joke.

"He's a good driver, I promise." Cas said, "After all, somebody's gotta man the getaway vehicle, right?"

"You are hilarious." Dean laughed.

"I know." Cas smiled, "Anna! Come get the keys!"

"I'm here." Anna reported, snatching the keys and marveling at their beauty, "And I'll try not to get pulled over."

"That's my girl." Cas applauded, bringing Anna in for a hug before letting her drive off in his car.

"She's your-" Dean questioned.

"Sister." Cas responded.

"How many siblings do you have?" Dean asked.

"Well, let's see. There's Gabe and Luci and Diri and Hael and Anna. That's five." Cas counted on his fingers.

"That's a lot." Dean commented as the pair walked towards Dean's car.

"Holy shit." Cas said, eyes sparkling at Dean's car, a 1967 Chevy Impala.

"I know. She's my pride and joy." Dean's eyes glimmered at the compliment, "Get in." Cas obliged, eyes still wide like saucers.

"Okay, so," Dean looked uncomfortable, "If you don't want to move the relationship too quickly I understand-"

"Dean, I'm demisexual. I can only feel sexual attraction after I have developed a deep emotional bond with somebody." Cas said, almost too quickly for Dean to make out the individual words.

"Okay, Cas." Dean said, "Let's go. I don't know the way to your house, could you please tell me?" Dean backed up and Cas pointed out how to get to his house.

"It's a bit small, I know, and-" Cas was interrupted by Dean's lips on his. It was definitely not worse than the first time, and still made Cas want to melt.

"It's perfect." Dean murmured against Cas' lips. Cas took Dean's hand and led him into his house.

"What are you doing here?" Cas asked Meg, who was laying down on his couch.

"Didn't feel like school, so I've decided to come over and steal your food and the love of your pets." Meg said, petting Trickster, who was passed out on her stomach.

"Who's this?" Dean asked, chuckling a little.

"Meg." Cas shrugged, "My ex."

"Your who now?" Dean repeated.

"We broke up, intending to stay friends. It's worked out so far." Cas shrugged again.

"Okay then," Dean said cautiously, "I'm just gonna-"

"Did Cassie bring home a _man _?" Meg gasped, leaping up and sending poor Trickster flying. Just as Gabe walked in the door.__

__"Trick!" Gabriel screeched, launching himself towards his precious dog. Trickster was pretending to be hurt, mostly to get attention._ _

__"He'll be fine." Meg said dismissively, "Now, Clarence, tell me all about him."_ _

__"This is Dean, my- wait, what are we?" Cas wondered, realizing they hadn't put much thought into it._ _

__"If you wouldn't mind, I would like to be boyfriends." Dean smiled softly._ _

__"Of course, you idiot." Cas smiled back, kissing Dean for the third time that day. It really was a new record for him._ _

__"Keep it in your pants." Chuck sighed from the kitchen, "And I suppose that makes one more-"_ _

__"Two." Gabriel piped up, as Sam raised his hand._ _

__"Two more," Chuck said, exasperated, "mouths to feed."_ _

__"We're sorry, sir, if you want we can just-" Dean was ready to take the easy exit, but Chuck waved Dean off._ _

__"No, you're staying, especially knowing Gabe." Gabriel smiled proudly._ _

__"Now, is Balthazar coming over?" Chuck sighed, this time in relief, when Gabriel shook his head, "Lovely. What about Charlie?"_ _

__"I'M HERE, BITCHES." Charlie appeared at the front door with Anna, who was face-palming in the background._ _

__"That answers my question." Chuck said, "We're having pulled pork tonight, do you boys have any allergies I should be aware of before you start staying over so often you become part of the family?"_ _

__"No." Dean was a little overwhelmed by the amount of _noise_ this family was capable of. Gabriel was playing tug-of-war with Trickster, Sam was watching, duly entertained, Anna and Charlie were heavy into a make-out session on the couch, Luci wasn't even in sight, and Cas was just standing there, looking expectantly at Dean. Meg was on the phone with either her girlfriend or little sister (her name might have been Ruby)._ _

__"Everything's so..." Dean searched for the right word, "Busy here."_ _

__"I know, that's why Luci has a laptop." Cas said, taking Dean's hand in his own, "Y'know, Chuck has a flatscreen in his room and doesn't pay attention. I bet we could sneak some popcorn into there and cuddle."_ _

__"That sounds wonderful." Dean whispered back. The co-conspirators left the room in favor of some microwave popcorn, a stern word from a slightly distracted Chuck, and some Netflix._ _

__"Oooh, Iron Man." Dean smiled._ _

__"Haven't seen it." Cas commented. Dean's jaw fell to the floor at that one._ _

__"You haven't seen Iron Man?" Dean's hand clicked the _play_ button, as there was no doubt about it, Cas was going to watch the shit out of that movie. Cas settled next to Dean, both of their backs resting on the headboard of Chuck's bed. Dean wrapped his arm around Cas' shoulders, and Cas laid his head on Dean's chest, engrossed in the movie._ _

__.o0o._ _

__"Hey, have you seen Dean and Cas?" Sam asked Gabriel after their fifth round of _Sorry Sliders_ (Sam somehow kept winning and Gabriel wouldn't stand for it)._ _

__"No-" Gabriel said, looking around. Meg was reading on the couch, Charlie and Anna were napping on the other couch, and Luci was still in his room, doing whatever Satan does during lazy afternoons._ _

__"They're in my room." Chuck said from the kitchen._ _

__"Thanks, Dad!" Gabriel called back from the living room, and against his (and Sam's) better judgment, headed to his father's room._ _

__"They're..." Sam couldn't finish._ _

__"Cuddling!" Gabriel squealed, taking out his phone and snapping some blackmail pictures. Cas had fallen asleep during the movie (don't ask me how), and Dean just couldn't move. It was like the unspoken rule- if a dog or cat falls asleep on your lap, you cannot move, no matter how badly you have to pee. So, Dean decided to fall asleep too._ _

__"Oh my God they're so adorable." Gabriel was officially in fangirl mode._ _

__"Calm down, we don't want to wake them." Sam sighed._ _

__"Yes you do, it's dinner time!" Chuck called from the kitchen._ _

__"You heard the man." Gabriel shrugged and smirked demonically._ _

__"Oh, shit." Sam cursed softly, but not stopping his friend from sneaking up to the left of the two and yelling, "UP UP GET UP UP UP!"_ _

__"Wha-" Dean fell out of the bed._ _

__"Dean!" Sam cackled, "Are you okay?"_ _

__"Shut up." Dean grumbled as Cas woke up and rubbed his eyes, hair more ruffled than before._ _

__"'Kay, come and eat, ya little shits!" Chuck shouted from the kitchen. Cas immediately perked up and he ushered a disgruntled Dean into the dining room._ _

__"Oh my god that looks good." Dean was already salivating over the pulled pork, which sat on a bun, dripping barbeque sauce._ _

__"Sit down, Dean." Cas chided. Dean took the seat next to Cas and clasped Cas' hand in his own._ _

__"Awww, young love." Chuck sighed, bringing in a pie. Dean's eyes widened._ _

__"Now, now, Dean-o, don't die over there." Lucifer came down the stairs, which led directly into the dining room for some reason. Dean, ever the rebel, continued to die from _pie_ until Sam and Gabe sat down suspiciously close._ _

__"What?" Sam asked as Dean narrowed his eyes._ _

__"Okay, so we kissed." Gabriel admitted. Charlie was trying way too hard not to have a fangirl meltdown._ _

__"Thank you. And remember, break his heart I'll break your face." Dean threatened, relaxing a little._ _

__"Duly noted." Gabriel smiled back, "And the sentiment is returned, but with more glitter."_ _

__"And another older brother." Luci said from the opposite end of the table. The rest of dinner was spent making small talk and some fangirling on the behalf of Charlie and Luci._ _

__"Well, I'm gonna go back upstairs. I've got a mafia to run." Lucifer said proudly, walking back upstairs._ _

__"He's not... serious, is he?" Sam asked._ _

__"Nobody knows." Gabriel replied seriously._ _

__"Okay, then." Dean said, "Hey, Sammy, if you want some more clothes or anything just tell me and I'll run back to the house."_ _

__"Okay." Sam nodded, "I'm kinda tired. Carry me." Sam lifted his arms up in Gabriel's direction, causing him to laugh and Trickster to look slightly put out._ _

__"Of course, my prince." Gabe chortled, lifting Sam up and carrying him bridal-style to his bunk, where they both collapsed and were snoring like nobody's business._ _

__"Carry me." Charlie mimicked Sam in Anna's direction._ _

__"We're crashing on the couch, if you want to get there you're gonna move your own lazy ass." Anna responded with a straight face._ _

__"Dean, I swear, if you tell me to carry you I will smack you." Cas bitchfaced Dean when Dean lifted up his arms in a mockery of Sam._ _

__"Okay then, snappy pants." Dean responded, getting up and walking to the guest room._ _

__"You ridiculous person." Cas hugged Dean from behind when he met up with him._ _

__"I know, Huggy Bear." Dean grinned cheekily._ _

__"Cuddle with me." Cas demanded, flopping onto the bed. Dean jumped onto the bed and landed right beside Cas, grasping his hand._ _

__"I live in a house full of love-stricken puppies." Lucifer said, mortified, from his room._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay serious time, can someone tell me what song the lyrics in the title are from because I have it stuck in my head all the time and I cannot figure it out


	7. More Michifer Because Michifer

The next day Lucifer burst into the guest room singing, "GOOD MORNING TO YOU, GOOD MORNING TO YOU, OUR DAY IS BEGINNING SO GOOD MORNING TO YOU!"

"...Why?" Dean groaned, hugging his Cas a little closer and savoring the warmth.

"You have to go to school today, idiots." Lucifer smiled and drew back the curtains like the freakish morning person that he was (his secret was coffee).

"I don't feel so good." Cas murmured, turning a nasty shade of green.

"Really?" Dean pressed his hands all over Cas' face, making Cas laugh.

"Holy hell, you're hot." Dean said, concerned.

"I've noticed." Cas giggled, "I'm too hot." he sang. Dean sighed.

"I guess this means you're staying home?" Luci said quietly, "Well, I'll just leave you two to it." he backed out, because even if he was an asshole, he had limits.

"Okay, Angel." Dean cooed soothingly, "You need anything?"

"Bucket. Popsicles." Cas groaned, "Chicken broth."

"On it." Dean smiled and hugged Cas closely once more before heading off.

"Nrrrrgggg." Cas groaned, trying not to vomit.

.o0o.

"Soooo..." Gabriel counted heads, "Where're Dean and Cassie?"

"Cas' sick." Lucifer supplied, "I'm decently sure Dean's being a mother-hen for the day."

"Okay, so, transportation's on Meg and Luci because _Anna don't give me that look you do not have a driver's license._ " Chuck sighed.

"Yes, sir!" Sam said, heading off to get his backpack and grinning ear to ear.

"See? He says 'sir'." Chuck pointed out, "He's going to marry you one day, Gabriel. One day."

"O...kay?" Gabriel was a bit wierded out, "Dad, quit being creepy."

"He's a good influence! I like him already!" Chuck crowed, "Now, shoo!" the children made their ways out the door.

"If I give Cassie my Lion will he feel better?" Hael asked Diri.

"Worth a shot." Diri responded. The two dashed back into the house and Hael grabbed her plush lion.

"Hey, Cassie." Hael said softly. Cas was currently sweating and shivering on top of his blankets, a bucket and some chicken noodle soup laying next to his bed. _Iron Man 2_ was playing on Netflix and Dean was taking Cas' temperature by forehead for what must have been the thirtieth time that day.

"I brought you Phil." Hael smiled, holding out her lion.

"Thanks." Dean grabbed the lion, "Maybe you two should get to school now." he gave Cas the plush toy, and Cas, being the adorable shit that he was, hugged it tightly to his chest.

.o0o.

"Hey, it's you again!" a cheerful voice almost made Luci flinch. Damn extraverts.

"Oh." Luci said eloquently as he turned around and saw the drool-worthy specter he had met the previous day.

"Lucifer, right?" Michael asked.

"Most people just call me Luci." Lucifer smiled a bit more warmly at him than he would normally. Gabriel narrowed his eyes and had to be physically restrained from screwing up Luci's potential relationship by Sam. Honestly, it wasn't that hard, just kiss him with candy in your mouth.

"Most people just call me Mike." Mike smiled. The two walked all the way over to their lockers, smiling- Luci would later recount- like complete idiots.

"So, you come here often?" Luci asked, because, although he was friggin' awful at keeping the conversation going, he certainly loved talking to this man.

"I should, I mean, it's school." Mike laughed.

"I'm using a pick-up line on you, you bumbling buffoon." Luci deadpanned, then broke into a lighthearted smile, which was returned.

"And I'm using a pick- up kiss." Mike said, grabbing Luci's face and putting his lips on his new friend's.

"And it worked, goddammit." Luci laughed.

"So, you wanna spend the hour in the science classroom right over there? It's completely abandoned." Mike's smile turned devious.

"Ooooh, a man after my own heart." Luci put his hands over his chest, "Let's go, already!"

.o0o.

_Dean's lips met with Cas'. Dean's hands, warm and somewhat rough, roamed everywhere. Cas moaned obscenely into Dean's mouth._

"Deeeeeeaaaaaannn." Cas moaned out loud. Dean's cheeks flushed and Chuck had the misfortune of hearing.

"Oh my Me, keep it down!" he yelled from the hallway.

"Sir, he's having a dream. I am doing nothing, I swear." Dean said innocently, walking out to stand in the hallway to prove it.

"Oh." Chuck looked highly embarrassed.

"It's fine." Dean leaned on the doorframe, making sure Cas hadn't woken up or started projectile vomiting or something.

"So, what's your story?" Chuck asked, "Because not just anybody can make friends with my kids. You have to be of a special breed to be friends with the Novaks."

"Well, my dad's an abusive shit, for one." Dean chuckled darkly. Chuck nodded but allowed Dean to finish his story, laundry basket perched on his hip.

"I was forced to raise Sam since I was four, thus the mother-henning. I'm sorry if you're used to-"

"Nah, you've just gotten rid of another stress in my day." Chuck smiled, "Honestly, since you and Sam stayed over, the house has been happier and more peaceful."

"Really?" Dean was curious.

"Well, these kids don't always get along all the time, obviously. They're all adopted, and Gabriel's a nosy shit and I'm pretty sure Luci runs the mafia, and that just doesn't mix."

"Ah." Dean said with a small laugh at the mention of Luci's probable-pastime, "Honestly, although he seems the type, I don't think he's serious enough for it."

"Yeah, thank Me for his love of anarchy." Chuck snorted a little.

"Yeah, thank you." Dean said with a wide smile and an, "Oh shit- Cas' awake! See you later, Sir!"

"Hey, Angel, need anything?" Dean asked, cheeks burning red at the memory of the noises Cas had made.

"Not at the moment, I'm feeling much-" Cas caught himself off when he retched into the bucket, "Nevermind."

"Are you okay?" Dean asked, mother-hen feature present.

"Yeah, sure," Cas rolled his eyes, "My mind's a friggin' traitor and I just vomited in a bucket. I'm just _peachy_ , Dean."

"Uh, mind telling me what your dream was about? I could kinda hear you- moaning." Dean's blush was back with a vengeance.

"O-oh." Cas stammered, blushing, "Well, some emotional bonds develop quicker than others, I guess."

"Okay, then. You want me to put on the next Iron Man movie?" Dean asked, pressing play before Cas could answer.


	8. I Have Two Chapter Titles That Are Songs Why Did I Choose Modern Country Pop

"Nerd!" the familiar voice made Sam groan. He'd been in such a good mood- Dean was at the house, too- so he really didn't want Crowley fucking up his day.

"You got that money?" Crowley hissed.

"No, I do not." Sam said, intending to sound strong and proud but winding up sounding like a slightly brain-damaged puppy.

"Well, little queer, guess I'm just gonna have to... compensate." Crowley grinned vindictively.

"Go 'way." Sam muttered, feeling the pressure of tears begin to build up behind his face.

"What was that? I couldn't hear it over the sound of the pain I'm about to inflict on you." Crowley's shark-toothed grin grew even wider.

"Actually, I think it's the sound of you never bothering the poor kid again." Lucifer had appeared, much to Sam (and, to a slightly lesser extent, Gabriel's) relief, "And a fiddle of gold against your soul, says I'm better 'n you."

"You wanna go?!" Crowley nearly screeched.

"Of course not, I wish to avoid conflict." Lucifer said with a demonic twinkle in his eye, "Of course, if you were to attack me, I couldn't, per say, defend myself."

"You sneaky little..." Crowley slinked off.

"You okay, Sammich?" Gabriel asked his friend. Sam nodded.

"You aren't okay." Gabriel peered into Sam's eyes and it seemed like he was gazing into Sam's soul.

"Okay, you got me." Sam sighed, "It's just, sometimes I get panic attacks-"

"I'm sorry-"

"And sometimes I feel depressed-"

"Thanks for telling me." Gabriel tried to lock gazes with Sam again, but Sam continued to squirm.

"Sam." Gabriel said softly to get his attention, "If this is because of what that bully did to you, or your father, I will personally make their lives living Hell."

"No, no, it's not their fault..." Sam barely whispered the _"It's mine."_ that followed.

"Oh, Samshine, not your fault. Theirs, for making your life hell." Sam really didn't know what to say to Gabriel's response.

"Now c'mon, it's time to show this school what the Trickster is capable of." Gabriel laughed evilly and dragged Sam off to Cas' car, which at the moment had a disturbing amount of lubricant in the trunk.

.o0o.

"And I said to her-" Lisa was talking to Bela about something or another, but her story was cut off by her own shriek.

"You okay?" Bela laughed.

"Just help me up." Lisa pointedly ignored the chortling from down the hall.

"Hey, ladies." Gabriel slid past in roller blades, Sam walking calmly behind in socks.

"Back off, he's mine." Sam winked at the girls.

"What even?" Becky, who had apparently missed the memo that Sam was gay, was confused in equal parts by her crush having a boyfriend, and the hallways currently covered in what looked like un-solidified wax. Little plastic beads and marbles became a major obstacle in the highest two grades, and the middle schoolers were suffering from nose whiplash- and by that, I mean that in one hallway it smelled like oranges, and another like exactly 37 cans of Axe, and another really, really terribly, almost like a skunk. Of course, with the distraction, Gabriel had managed to spray-paint _Fear the Trickster_ exactly 100 times in the courtyard.

"You weren't kidding." Sam noted, covered in lube (don't take that the wrong way), Mardi Gras beads, and black spray paint.

"I never kid about pranks." Gabriel said proudly, "Or baking. But mostly pranks.

.o0o.

While administration tried to A, calm down both schools, and B, attempt- and fail- to figure out who had done this, Gabriel and Sam could not stop laughing. Lucifer, of course, immediately knew who had done it, and also knew that Gabriel was not one to make mad. He had learned that lesson the Hard Way (more famously known as the Great Prank War of 2010).

"So, who do you think did it?" Michael asked as the two exited the science classroom to face the hallway covered in Mardi Gras beads and marbles.

"No clue." Lucifer wasn't one to betray his siblings. The two hiked their backpacks up onto their shoulders and attempted to walk into the halls, falling into each other's arms after exactly 1.7 steps.

"This is torture!" Michael gasped, attempting to stay extremely still, not laughing or moving at all.

"Hang on," Lucifer dug around in his backpack and found what he was looking for. He offered the cleats to Michael, who looked suspiciously in his direction.

"Never know when they'll come in handy." Lucifer shrugged, putting the soccer shoes on and offering Michael a piggy back ride. Michael put Lucifer's bag on his own shoulder and jumped on his back.

"Move it! Comin' through!" Michael yelled, Lucifer's feet being one of few to actually keep traction on the slick floor.

"So... wanna go out sometime?" Lucifer asked.

"Love to." Michael peered over Lucifer's shoulder and smiled at him.

"I have to go now," Lucifer sighed once the couple had reached the parking lot.

"That's sad, I suppose I'll see you tomorrow." Michael said goodbye.

"Yeah, if my baby brother doesn't have the Plague, poor kid's been sick all day." Lucifer waved to Michael as he settled into his van to pick up Diri and Hael.


	9. Leave This Blue Neighborhood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two weeks passes quickly; John gets back because I'm an awful human being.

"Do we really have to go back?" Sam whined.

"Chuck's workin' on filing a CPS complaint right now, if we're lucky he'll have custody over us before the New Year." Dean said, hope gleaming in his eyes. The two weeks had passed like the blink of an eye. Gabe and Sam had spent an obscene amount of time cooking and baking- even candy making, which Gabriel was unnaturally good at, although that was a given. Dean had spent the whole of the two weeks getting Cas caught up on all of pop culture. Ever. Shawshank Redemption, Ferris Bueler's Day Off, Every Superhero Movie Ever, and the Harry Potter series topped the list. The family had explained that Shurley and Novak were interchangeable for them, as Shurley was Chuck's pen name when writing, and Novak his actual name.

"And once we've left the house-"

"We can live with the Novaks until we're 18." Dean nodded, "And we can still technically date the Novaks because I will take legal standing over both of us, and Chuck will merely be providing a place for us to stay."

"That's cool." Sam said before turning back to face the car window. Dean pulled into the driveway to find his father's truck wasn't in the driveway yet- thank God.

"Didn't he say he'd be back by three?" Sam questioned. Dean had gotten a- rather hasty looking- text from his father that had read: **B back by 3. Take care of Sammy.**

"Sure did." Dean responded, looking around.

"Well, I guess we'll just go inside anyway." Dean sighed, taking the duffel bag he'd brought over to the Novaks' on the third day inside with him. 

John didn't show up until nine.

"Who- who installed this damned door?!" John raged when he barely managed to open it for his own drunkenness. Dean ushered Sam upstairs as quickly as humanly possible. John slurred and fell flat on his face. Dean heaved a sigh of relief that his father couldn't hurt them, and he and Sam quickly got ready for bed and fell asleep.

.o0o.

When the boys woke up John hadn't moved. Dean hadn't noticed before, but John's skin was ghostly pale, and he was starting to smell.

"Y'think he's dead?" Sam asked, somewhere between absolutely terrified and hopeful. Dean would've thought John to be dead if not for the odd breath he sucked in slowly- only a few times a minute.

"Should we call somebody?" Sam inquired quietly, as if any sound at all could wake the man. Dean nodded his head and pulled his phone out of his pocket, moving like he'd just spotted a bear passed out on their rug.

"Hello, this is 911, what's your emergency?" the responder asked patiently.

"Uhh... My father passed out last night because he drank too much and hasn't woken up or moved, and he's really pale and breathing slowly. He smells like barf." Dean supplied.

"Okay, just keep an eye on him until we get there, tell us if he stops breathing entirely." the woman on the line said smoothly. She typed something into her keyboard and sirens could be vaguely heard in the distance.

"911's coming, Sammy, don't lose your shit." Dean hissed at his little brother, who really looked like he had to pee.

"Okay." Sam calmed down a little and resumed staring at their comatose father. The boys did keep an eye on their father- it's not like they wanted him to die, he was family, after all.

.o0o.

A few minutes later, an ambulance arrived and the paramedics loaded John into the ambulance with a breathy-thingy pumping air into his lungs and liquids ready to be dispensed into his bloodstream.

"Will Dad be okay?" Sam asked one of the paramedics as he and Dean clambered into the back of the vehicle with the other EMS workers.

"Of course," a kind-looking African American woman smiled at them, "Name's Missouri. We'll have your daddy up and running again in no time."

"Oh." Sam looked kind of scared at the prospect of John running. The man was already physically _stronger_ than Sam, but Sam was faster.

"What's wrong, sugar?" Missouri asked the younger of the Winchesters.

"I don't like him." Dean sent Sam a disapproving glance at his words.

"Well, it's true!" Sam defended himself, "He's not exactly Father Of The Year, now is he?"

"Y'know," Missouri interrupted, "I once heard that family don't end in blood, but it don't start there either."

"Oh." Sam and Dean's eyes widened in surprise. They hadn't thought about that before.

"Now, do you want us to drop you off somewhere, or?" Missouri pried.

"You're driving our father _to the hospital_ -"

"I can make a few exceptions." Missouri smiled mischievously.

"2278, Pennsylvania Avenue." Dean recited the Novaks' address.

"HANK, 2278, PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE, WE'RE MAKIN' A PIT-STOP." Missouri yelled to the man on the other side. He nodded and made a left.

"Breaking the law for us doesn't seem fair." Sam complained.

"You getting such a bad deal in life wasn't fair, hun." Missouri smiled sadly at the boys, "Well, you're here. Have a nice Saturday, other than your father most likely getting alcohol poisoning. I'll make sure to stick his IV in at least ten places without a vein."

"Bye, I guess." Dean said, getting out of the ambulance and helping his brother too.

"I don't know about you, but my weekend just got a whole lot better." Sam smiled at Dean, who smiled right back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No, Mr. FBI agent, I did not look up alcohol poisoning to actually poison someone! The fact that a few weeks ago I looked up electroshock therapy has nothing to do with this! Just an author *laughs nervously* yeah... not one of the serial killers who frequent Tumblr for sure...


	10. Why Are All Of Troye Sivan's Songs Shouting At Me? -By Fall Out Boy

Thanks to their father's 'episode', Chuck managed to get custody over the boys within that month.

"Yeah!" Dean yelled when he heard the news, pumping his fist in the air. He and Cas kissed once, much to Luci's displeasure.

"I'm kinda terrified of Luci's new boyfriend," Sam whispered to Gabe, "He has that calm demeanor that Luci was missing to run the mafia."

"Damn... you're right." Gabe returned.

"You two talkin' shit about us?" Luci asked. He and Michael were sprawled out on the recliner, limbs tangled together.

"NO- no of course not!" Sam smiled in the sort of 'Don't Make Any Sudden Moves' way.

"Well, Moose, I suggest you run before I decide otherwise." Luci narrowed his eyes.

"Don't scare the younglings. They haven't done anything." Mike chastised, narrowing his eyes at the smols, "Yet."

"And we won't!" Gabe mimicked Sam, and the two exited faster than Zayn from One Direction. Cas and Dean soon followed, returning to Dean's attempt to nerd-ify Cas. Charlie and Anna went out and did whatever people who actually leave the house do, and Luci was busy forcing Mike to watch YouTube.

.o0o.

"Luci, nobody cares about Phan!" Mike snapped after the third PINOF video.

"You- you take that back!" Luci said playfully, throwing popcorn in Mike's face, "You still haven't seen the _first PINOF video_."

Cue dramatic background music.

And, by the end of the video, Mike was definitely trash.

"They're out, right?" Mike said, voice barely a whisper.

"Nope. But there's a lot of speculation." Luci said in reply, "I'll show you."

And that's how the two teenagers spent the whole day looking through the 'phan proof' tag on Tumblr.

"Hey, Luci, do you think our lives would make a good YouTube channel?" Mike asked, three and a half hours into the Tumblr spree.

"I'd never thought about that," Luci said, "Huh. You're right."

"I've got a camera on my phone," Mike shrugged, taking his phone out of his pocket. He and Luci began filming.

.o0o.

Ten years and two million subscribers later (don't ask me how, but that channel was super popular) the filming of their highly dysfunctional family was super popular (who knew?).

Gabe and Sam ran the comedy sketches, Mike and Luci vlogged (and fangirled), Dean and Cas made conspiracy videos for popular tv shows and movies (Cas wasn't the first one to think that Sherlock and John were very gay for each other), Anna and Charlie were very happy to stay away from the YouTube channel in favor of releasing music EPs (and the subsequent music videos on the shared channel), and the channel followed Diri and Hael as they made their way through highschool (and, as it turns out, Diri was the only straight one. Go figure.).

.o0o.

 _"This story's been kinda chaotic, and for that, I apologize. But, here's the thing. Life is chaotic. So, in case you wanted to know how this channel was even started, that's why. The family's done a pretty shitty job of explaining it any other way."_ Diri winked at the camera, and Luci- who had been passing through the room- mockingly punched him in the shoulder.

"We did a good enough job, asshat." Mike sniggered, "This video wasn't even necessary."

"Don't mess with my work," Diri shot back as the two walked out of frame, "Anyway, I went around and collected stories from everyone. We don't really know what happened before we were adopted- well, except Luci, but he doesn't like to talk about it. So, I think that just about wraps up the story of how we all met. Tune in next week for... something! Who the fuck knows!"

"LANGUAGE." Chuck yelled from his study.

"Fucking spidey-senses." Diri cursed quietly. He said a quick 'Good-bye' and turned off the camera. The seventeen-year-old stretched and walked around the living room.

So, what had happened in the past few years? Well, Mike and Luci got engaged- and a nice place in St. Louis. Dean and Cas graduated and were both currently in school, and Sam had gotten a full ride to Stanford. Gabe skipped college in favor of opening a bakery, which was really popular, thanks to their YouTube channel. Anna and Charlie became relatively well-known musicians, with music that contained deep lyrics and amazing baselines.

Diri and Hael were the only ones still in school, and they were thriving. Their fondest memory was when an asshole kid- Dick Roman- called Diri out on having so many gay siblings- and Hael punched him in the face.

Diri sighed at the memories. It seemed like so long ago when Dean and Sam and Mike magically appeared in their lives- and it paid off greatly. They were all content, all happy, in the spotlight. It seemed Chuck's legacy reached his kids.

Fame was an aspect of their lives they didn't account for- Dean and Sam- but it didn't mean they weren't happy.

So, a happy ending. That's where I'll leave you. Happy endings aren't a rarity, but what happened to Sam and Dean was. They were rescued and saved in one fell swoop- from everyone else and themselves. They would be happy for a long time.

And, really, that's all someone can hope for.

A happy ending.


End file.
